This isn't just an entry about finally successfully potty training my 3 years, 10 month old son...it's about what I have learned as a parent and person. I feel the way that someone learns and problem solves is the true insight into a person and who they are. In this case - the potential of who they will be.
I consider myself to be a natural teacher. I feel that I can teach anything I know to someone else and better than it was taught to me. My confidence was unwavering...until I had to work on potty training my son.
There is undue pressure on all parents to have their child potty trained in order to go to school or be moved up into the next level at daycare. It is an incredible pressure that just can't be understood until you have gone through it. Your entire worth as a parent becomes potty training. Failure means your child won't be ready for school on time, be left behind by his peers and be left behind FOREVER! Okay, a little dramatic but it becomes a crazy sense of urgency to get this natural process of growing up complete.
I never worried about potty training til my son was about 2 1/2 and then I realized I had better start reading up on this. We had a little potty in the bathroom of our house since my son was 1. He would sit on it, rarely. I thought, hey, I can do this. I mean how hard can it be? I know how to use a toilet. Everyone I know uses one successfully. I was ready to hit it head on. I bought a book "How to Potty Train your Child in just One day." It's a great book. Really talks to parents about all the pressures we are put under to get our children potty trained by a certain age. I followed the procedure in the book exactly. I really thought my son was ready. He wasn't. That attempt was about a year ago. I had little success and lots of laundry. I felt defeated. I was so confident that I could teach him.
Various other events took place to thwart my efforts. I went active duty in the Navy and I was separated from my children (on and off...mostly off) for about 6 months. Anyone who watched/babysat my children swore they would have him trained in a week. Yeah, right.
And it goes without saying that there is TONS of advice from people who don't have kids or those that do and claim there child was potty trained a year old. Yeah, right.
My son, being who he is, does things at his own pace. He crawled at 11 months, walked at 14 months and spoke (more than his native Klingon) at 3 years old. He is not on any one's schedule but his own. I know that about him. He is a creature of habit. My mother called him mini-"Monk" (after the OCD TV detective of the same name) at an early age. Things had to be just so. If not, this lead to great tantrums and we would never know why (he couldn't communicate in English clearly enough). He likes to know how things work and he likes a procedure. I don't think I took these things into consideration when initially training him. I just thought - he's getting trained darn it!
A few months ago he started going to a home daycare where there is a boy a few months younger than him that is also going through potty training. This sense of friendly competition and encouragement had caused my son to turn a corner.
My son had been dry in the morning for over a month and through is naps. A sign a child is ready for potty training. He had been using the potty at the home daycare during the day (to urinate only). Rarely at home and he was still in pull ups. About a week ago my son came home and said he needed a "clean diaper." He insisted. I knew why. There was one part of bathroom business he didn't want to do in the potty. Once I put the pull up on him - he did what he had to do. That's when I decided - anyone old enough to ask for a clean diaper is old enough to use the potty. The next morning I put him in underwear and he hasn't been in a pull up since. Dry all night and day. He does everything in the potty now. No wet accidents and rarely any of the other kind.
My son will do things at his own pace. I should have remembered that. And I think I forget that like any other human being he has a will of his own. I need to keep this in mind as I teach him the other things he must know to move successfully through an uncertain, often unforgiving yet filled with possibilities world we live in.
Needless to say we are all extremely proud of him. Almost giddy with delight. He is also proud. This was not the impossible task that it seemed to be - just 2 weeks ago. It was part of being a parent and a child.
And suddenly, my son appears to be older. He is tall and lean and carries himself like a child and not a toddler. A little man.
Sunday, January 20, 2008
Tuesday, January 15, 2008
Pushing Daisies
There are not many shows on TV that I consider "must see TV." I have written about most of them like The Closer and Criminal Minds. My new favorite (since it's debut in the fall) is Pushing Daisies.
Pushing Daisies is a hard show to describe...smart writing, slick acting, comedy, romance and oddness...all blend with technicolor sets to create an indescribable TV experience. Really, I can't describe. I could try but it sounds to weird to work.
Our hero, Ned, discovered at a young age that he could bring things back to life by just touching them. And can return them to dead by touching them again. The hitch is that he has to make them dead again within 2 minutes or something or someone else will die in it's place. None of this is explained.
Ned owns a pie restaurant, The Pie Hole, in which he serves pie and conducts business with his private detective buddy (who knits when he is stressed). Their business is that Ned touches murder victims, finds out who killed them and collects the reward money. Until one fateful day a murder victim is Ned's childhood sweetheart, Chuck, whom he touches and brings back to life. He leaves her that way. They are madly in love but can't touch each other. Chuck was raised by her Aunts (retired synchronized swimming stars) who don't know she was brought back to life.
There are way out plot lines, fast dead pan dialogue and an excellent cast led by Lee Pace and Anna Friel and supported by such veteran actors as Chi McBride, Ellen Greene and Swoozie Kurtz. There is much more the show than what I have described because you just have to see it to believe it.
This program wins my vote for every award shows' "best new television series" and "best comedy series of the year."
This is a visual taste sensation that is not to be missed on Wednesday nights. Bon appetite.
Pushing Daisies is a hard show to describe...smart writing, slick acting, comedy, romance and oddness...all blend with technicolor sets to create an indescribable TV experience. Really, I can't describe. I could try but it sounds to weird to work.
Our hero, Ned, discovered at a young age that he could bring things back to life by just touching them. And can return them to dead by touching them again. The hitch is that he has to make them dead again within 2 minutes or something or someone else will die in it's place. None of this is explained.
Ned owns a pie restaurant, The Pie Hole, in which he serves pie and conducts business with his private detective buddy (who knits when he is stressed). Their business is that Ned touches murder victims, finds out who killed them and collects the reward money. Until one fateful day a murder victim is Ned's childhood sweetheart, Chuck, whom he touches and brings back to life. He leaves her that way. They are madly in love but can't touch each other. Chuck was raised by her Aunts (retired synchronized swimming stars) who don't know she was brought back to life.
There are way out plot lines, fast dead pan dialogue and an excellent cast led by Lee Pace and Anna Friel and supported by such veteran actors as Chi McBride, Ellen Greene and Swoozie Kurtz. There is much more the show than what I have described because you just have to see it to believe it.
This program wins my vote for every award shows' "best new television series" and "best comedy series of the year."
This is a visual taste sensation that is not to be missed on Wednesday nights. Bon appetite.
Friday, January 4, 2008
Viva La Long Johns!
I'm cold. And I am going to continue complaining about it being cold...until it is warm. I shake my fist bitterly at the sky as I brace myself against face biting snow flurries and strong winds off the water. I'm cold.
With that being said, I am challenged by being a cold weather mommy. I never had to worry about coats, gloves, hats, boots, etc. I lived in Florida for 10 years and my son spent the first 3 years of his life in shorts and t-shirts. But now we live in Virginia - where it is cold.
I am challenged by things that seem silly like, getting a toddler in a car seat with a big winter coat, being late because of said bundling and making sure the kids are warm enough or not too warm. I never watched the weather forecast so much in my life. It's like every day I am expecting a hurricane (pretty much that is all we worry about in Florida). I watch and wonder about: Do I put them in a turtleneck or long sleeve t-shirt? And will the temperature drop 20 degrees as soon as it gets dark? (which is when I pick them up). I also think about running them out to the car with no coat - to make it easier to buckle them in or do I worry about them sweating under those coats? We won't even get into the allergies, ear infections, runny noses, coughs and pneumonia that all this winter weather has brought us.
The cold weather is a small concern on the grand scheme of things but something the movie mommy never had to worry about before. As for myself...I wear long johns. Yup, nothing fancy. No silk ones for me - just the usual waffle pattern ones. I wear them to work under my uniform, much to the amusement of my co-workers. And in an office with no heat - I have the last laugh.
With that being said, I am challenged by being a cold weather mommy. I never had to worry about coats, gloves, hats, boots, etc. I lived in Florida for 10 years and my son spent the first 3 years of his life in shorts and t-shirts. But now we live in Virginia - where it is cold.
I am challenged by things that seem silly like, getting a toddler in a car seat with a big winter coat, being late because of said bundling and making sure the kids are warm enough or not too warm. I never watched the weather forecast so much in my life. It's like every day I am expecting a hurricane (pretty much that is all we worry about in Florida). I watch and wonder about: Do I put them in a turtleneck or long sleeve t-shirt? And will the temperature drop 20 degrees as soon as it gets dark? (which is when I pick them up). I also think about running them out to the car with no coat - to make it easier to buckle them in or do I worry about them sweating under those coats? We won't even get into the allergies, ear infections, runny noses, coughs and pneumonia that all this winter weather has brought us.
The cold weather is a small concern on the grand scheme of things but something the movie mommy never had to worry about before. As for myself...I wear long johns. Yup, nothing fancy. No silk ones for me - just the usual waffle pattern ones. I wear them to work under my uniform, much to the amusement of my co-workers. And in an office with no heat - I have the last laugh.
Wednesday, January 2, 2008
Movie Reviews
AT THE MOVIES:
National Treasure - Book of Secrets: I loved the last National Treasure movie. So, if you are like me - you will love this one as well. Nicholas Cage and company go on another treasure hunt with secrets hidden in things like the desk in the Oval office and a desk in Buckingham Palace. This of course means Cage has to get access to these locations. He also has to get information out of a book that only the President of the United States has access to or knows about - the "book of secrets." This book contains stuff like Area 51 information and JFK assination facts. The reason our heroes are on this quest is to clear the name of Cage's character's ancestor who is accused of helping James Wilkes Booth assinate President Lincoln. This keeps everyone very busy and eventually leads to Native American treasure that was supposed to help the Confederates during the Civil War. The story gets a little convoluted but is great fun from beginning to end.
MMMM (out of 5 M's)
Enchanted: This sweetheart of a movie is sure to be fun for everyone in the entire family or even if you don't bring them...you will still enjoy it! The premise is kind of silly but not unique - a cartoon character is transformed into real person in NYC. The thing about this fish out of water scenario is the fact that Disney is not afraid to poke fun at itself. Our heroine assumes everyone is as nice as they are in her fairytale world and that leads to a reality check while at the same time making harsh citizens of the live action world soften up a bit. There are some great tunes as our gal is not afraid to just break into song and enough humor to make adults laugh. This is not really a kids movie - maybe kids over the age of 10 but there is some humor they might not get. Bring your suspension of disbelief with you and you will leave feeling good and...like singing a happy song.
MMMM (out of 5 M's)
ON VIDEO:
Stardust: This was a fun movies that fans of The Princess Bride, Ella Enchanted and other fun fantastical movies should enjoy. The knowledge that an unknown world is beyond a stone fence in England is to much for a young man to ignore and he decides to tempt fate and venture accross. The result of this short journey will lead his own son and a fallen star on an adventure that involves witches, kings, ghosts and pirates. Robert DeNiro and Michelle Pfieffer are standouts and are appearing to have a great time of it. Just enjoy.
MMM (out of 5 M's)
The Waitress: The fact that the only "star" in this movie is Kerri Russell should be a strong indication of lameness...but I read the box for the movie and it used words like "sassy" and "comedy." It was also supposed to leave me "inspired." Well, after induring this movie for 2 hours - I found myself hardpressed to find any of these items. Russell plays a young woman that works at a pie shop and gets pregnant by her very abusive husband. She ends up having an affair with her married obstetrian. There are some amusing things that happen in this movie like the fact that everytime she feels a strong emotion she thinks up a pie to go along with it, "the baby is keeping me up all night pie," "I hate my husband pie," etc. In the end Russell's character does have an epiphany after having the baby - which is good. But inspired? Sassy? Comedy? Nope. I guess I was really expecting those things. If they said "drama" then I wouldn't have been waiting for it to be funny. And Kerri Russell cannot carry a movie at all.
M (out of 5 M's)
Land of the Blind: Two hours of my life I won't get back. This total dog isn't worth the space in this blog to mention. Ralph Finnes and Donald Sutherland are totally wasted in this weird movie.
Zero M's
National Treasure - Book of Secrets: I loved the last National Treasure movie. So, if you are like me - you will love this one as well. Nicholas Cage and company go on another treasure hunt with secrets hidden in things like the desk in the Oval office and a desk in Buckingham Palace. This of course means Cage has to get access to these locations. He also has to get information out of a book that only the President of the United States has access to or knows about - the "book of secrets." This book contains stuff like Area 51 information and JFK assination facts. The reason our heroes are on this quest is to clear the name of Cage's character's ancestor who is accused of helping James Wilkes Booth assinate President Lincoln. This keeps everyone very busy and eventually leads to Native American treasure that was supposed to help the Confederates during the Civil War. The story gets a little convoluted but is great fun from beginning to end.
MMMM (out of 5 M's)
Enchanted: This sweetheart of a movie is sure to be fun for everyone in the entire family or even if you don't bring them...you will still enjoy it! The premise is kind of silly but not unique - a cartoon character is transformed into real person in NYC. The thing about this fish out of water scenario is the fact that Disney is not afraid to poke fun at itself. Our heroine assumes everyone is as nice as they are in her fairytale world and that leads to a reality check while at the same time making harsh citizens of the live action world soften up a bit. There are some great tunes as our gal is not afraid to just break into song and enough humor to make adults laugh. This is not really a kids movie - maybe kids over the age of 10 but there is some humor they might not get. Bring your suspension of disbelief with you and you will leave feeling good and...like singing a happy song.
MMMM (out of 5 M's)
ON VIDEO:
Stardust: This was a fun movies that fans of The Princess Bride, Ella Enchanted and other fun fantastical movies should enjoy. The knowledge that an unknown world is beyond a stone fence in England is to much for a young man to ignore and he decides to tempt fate and venture accross. The result of this short journey will lead his own son and a fallen star on an adventure that involves witches, kings, ghosts and pirates. Robert DeNiro and Michelle Pfieffer are standouts and are appearing to have a great time of it. Just enjoy.
MMM (out of 5 M's)
The Waitress: The fact that the only "star" in this movie is Kerri Russell should be a strong indication of lameness...but I read the box for the movie and it used words like "sassy" and "comedy." It was also supposed to leave me "inspired." Well, after induring this movie for 2 hours - I found myself hardpressed to find any of these items. Russell plays a young woman that works at a pie shop and gets pregnant by her very abusive husband. She ends up having an affair with her married obstetrian. There are some amusing things that happen in this movie like the fact that everytime she feels a strong emotion she thinks up a pie to go along with it, "the baby is keeping me up all night pie," "I hate my husband pie," etc. In the end Russell's character does have an epiphany after having the baby - which is good. But inspired? Sassy? Comedy? Nope. I guess I was really expecting those things. If they said "drama" then I wouldn't have been waiting for it to be funny. And Kerri Russell cannot carry a movie at all.
M (out of 5 M's)
Land of the Blind: Two hours of my life I won't get back. This total dog isn't worth the space in this blog to mention. Ralph Finnes and Donald Sutherland are totally wasted in this weird movie.
Zero M's
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